Posts Tagged ‘friendship’

The Pleasure of Giving

In General thoughts, In my mind on February 5, 2012 at 2:40 pm

When you see life the way I do, that strong urge to give to others just to see their face radiate with joy, is inevitable.

How and why, these questions I can’t answer. It often occurs to me to wonder why I am so different, why does this need to reach for others’ happiness keep growing? I’ve given up finding the answer because in the end, giving to others is not a burden at all.

Maybe I always feel like we are all so engrossed in striving for our way through life that we easily forget the small pleasures we can derive from it. After all, what’s the use of living if you can’t smile, if you can’t love and if you can’t find any bright light shining on you?

Hence, that pleasure I derive in giving to others. It makes the world, even if it is not the whole of it, but the one around me, a happier and jollier one. I don’t do it for attention, I do it because it is a need I have to fulfill and get the satisfaction that my life didn’t go to waste. In life, we can achieve great materialistic heights but if we can’t make simple little things count, we would have spent an empty, meaningless life.

And this is also what gives me pleasure in giving away. It is the possibility to make one simple thing – a flower, a chocolate bar, a candle or anything so simple, even a smile – become the expression of sweet affection and love. It is giving the phrase,  “It’s the thought that counts“, it’s real meaning.

Actually writing this article isn’t meant to boast about me but again to share about it. Sometimes when you feel so different from others, the mind and heart seek to be heard and understood. This blog is a means to voice it out. No matter if no one reads or a few do. Putting in words what I feel and what I go through makes it a relief to have expressed what’s inside my head…

More than a friend, yet not a lover

In In my mind on November 16, 2011 at 9:49 am

You’ve been one of those surprises of life

Which unfold themselves slowly with time,

Evoking admiration, affection and decline

For yet another person in my heart.

Yet you’ve been that light and shine,

That support when I’ve been hanging on the line,

That wish for staying a bit more alive,

That reason that made me smile…

This might seem like a love declaration,

Yes, it is but I wish it to remain pure,

To keep its innocence and initial essence

As my love for you is only sweet affection.

How do we describe it, how is it called,

This I’m not being able to decide.

In such short time, we’ve been laughing,

Crying and sharing so much emotions.

It might be this emotional fool in me

That’s making all this fuss about you and me,

Yet now that our ways are to part,

To you I had to pour my heart.

Thank you for the sunny days,

The smile on your face,

And the deep look in your eyes.

All those special things that make you

More than a friend, yet not a lover…

A boy and a girl, together

In General thoughts on October 2, 2010 at 4:16 pm

I bet many of you who read the title immediately thought of some love story. No, this is not about romance or love. It’s a reflection about how the human mind quickly jumps to conclusions plus the consequences of living in a little island, still tightly attached to its traditional opinions.

I’ve noticed it’s pretty common to hear people talk about seeing some girl with some guy (or vice-versa) and deducing that they are dating each other. The fact that they might only be friends is far too incongruous to accept. Well, so it seems…

It even happened to me that a good friend of mine was mistaken for my boyfriend. Being the only person I already know in my masters class, I’ve been talking and sitting next to him since the beginning. It was not much to my astonishment that the idea of us being boyfriend/girlfriend grew in others’ mind. Yet, I still find it so incredibly easy for people to judge by appearance. I hold no grudge against anyone, rest assured. It’s just that the very thought of how quick a judgement is made that kind of irritates me.

The reason behind my irritation is that with such reaction from others, girls very easily gain all kinds of reputation, specially in our traditional society. I know the new generations are more open to all these issues. However, no matter in which century we are , the image of a girl will always remain fragile and easy to destroy.

Does it mean that we should stop walking in public with our male friends? I believe it is indeed hypocritical to accept seeing 2 girls or 2 boys together and have no hind thoughts! It’s time to think beyond those ‘gender limits’. A boy and a girl together does not limit itself to a love affair. There’s a human factor that is being ignored. Friendship is not limited to same genders. Once you’ve been able to understand someone beyond his/her sex, you’ve reached a special level of friendship – which involves mutual respect, closeness and maturity.

I believe that no one is to be blamed. It is a result of a conservative mindset, a legacy of our traditional society. Things will and can only change when firstly young people behave more responsibly, by knowing where’s the line between friendship, love and sex. And secondly, when we all will come to accept in our minds that a boy and a girl can very well be friends without any thing more in between them…